the end of the seeker

dear legend of the seeker,

i heard last week that your awesomely, boob-erific, cheesy show


(that is so lame it is fetch)


will be no more.


while i am not entirely surprised, i am very sad.


and decided to pay tribute in the only way i know how


a homage:

good bye

sexy abs in tight leather pants



good bye

bad a** knife wielding chick with boobs always out



good bye

s&m dominatrix with weapons that are clearly vibrators



good bye

crazy old wizard who only throws kick asphalt wizards fire when it is convenient to the plot


good bye

disney aladdin/genie like villian who never seems to be able to kill the seeker, despite trying each week



good bye

magic amulets, that there was always an abundance of

and were the key to saving towns

(srsly who keeps making all these amulets???)




you have provided demos and i countless hours of discussing your often confusing, but awesomely awesome show


you will be missed,

no quiero taco bell

dear valentine

this one goes out to an american icon who recently passed away. no, i'm not talking about michael jackson. and no its not ferrah fawcett either. a moment of silence please on behalf of gidget, the taco bell dog.

******(silence)********

poor tiny little gidget died tuesday of a stroke. after a good long 15 years of life she's now in heaven with the angels, providing them with tasty, cheap, tex mex in the sky. here's to you gidget. we applaud your life's work of making taco's the most adorable food on the planet.

hi, valentine here

dear billy,

this has been a sad few days, first ed mcmahon, then farrah, then michael and now you....why you were taken so soon, i do not know. all you were trying to do is make the world a cleaner place with your very enthusiastic shouting talking and thumbs upping.

i have been giving it some thought, as to what was the best way to honor you and the only way i can think of is to list all of my favorite infomercials. what can i say? this is the form that my grief is taking.

ah, the food dehydrator. i remember watching this one thinking "man, wouldn't it be great if i could make my own beef jerky??" talk about a great infomercial!

it made a 10 year old girl, who does not particularly care for meat, want to make her own effing jerky!! congrats food dehydrator guy, congrats.

the dude who wants us all to get money from the gov. i mean, how is this guy not to be trusted and taken seriously? he has a question mark jacket, which we all know, is very, very expensive. he must have the secrets to gov. money,

otherwise, how could he afford that styling jacket? yeah, the shouting helped as well, to drive home the message that he was serious





the space bags....what a great invention. i mean, who doesn't have 15 winter coats that always seem to be in the way? what to do, what to do? i know, suction them into bags that are effing difficult to get into and let's face it, look very weird.

but i do like how the safari hat makes it look like our closets are a jungle. baahaa!! oh you advertising geniuses, you are effing hilarious!



last, but not least, the cornballer!! k, so this isn't a real product, but doesn't mean that i don't love seeing george sr. trying to peddle his shotty piece of shiz cornballer, both in america and mexico.

if this was available, i know i'd buy it, just so i could gather round my family and friends and so we'd "all be laughing and cornholing"

i give you two thumbs up,