Thursday, December 3, 2009

H1N1 pie

dear valentine,

thanksgiving holiday sucks monkey balls. it is my least fav holiday ever. its def suckier than halloween, and i think even crappier than valentines day (although the extra time off work for thanksgiving is super amazing).

i mean srsly, the decorations suck, the overindulgence on food makes me feel like crap, and then all teh dudes want to watch football all f*ckin day. (although in DH family, his dad makes all the guys go play the "gee-tar" with him which means a little less football on the tv).

but the shining light on this crap-fest of a holiday is my delectable vegan pumpkin pie.

(NO KITTEH!!! this is my pot pie!! bad kitteh!!)

i make one pumpkin pie every year, and its amazing. i bake it in a graham cracker crust which is even more amazing. (i hate normal pie crusts, i think they must be a communist invention with the sole purpose of ruining pie, and thereby destroying the capitalist free market system). and i take said amazing pie every year to the family thanksgiving dinner where it sits among about 10 other pumpkin pies (none of which are vegan).

and every year, without fail, the same family members want to try my pie, for no other reason than because its vegan. IT TASTES EXACTLY THE SAME AS IT DID LAST YEAR! there is only one vegan pie to be shared amongst three vegans, GO EAT YOUR OWN EFFING REGULAR PIE!!!!

this year we labeled the box "H1N1 pie" and hid it in the kitchen with the hopes that no one would see it, but if they did, perhaps they would confuse it with some twisted thanksgiving terrorist plot.

and guess what? this year NO ONE else in my entire family made pumpkin pie.

(guess its a good thing i finally decided to make two!)




7 comments:

BonBon Rose Girls Kristin said...

Greedy bastards. Ah ha. And am I looking at a Vader kitten? Priceless!

Fresh Squeezed Orange Juice said...

ok so I totally would have agreed w u on the pie crust thing like 2 days ago but OMG I made a pie w a real pie crust expecting nastiness & it was DELISH!!!! not those premade hard pir crusts but like homemade or the kind u buy from the store & have to roll out. its softer & fresh &....prob not vegan heh heh oh well...i guess I'm talking to myself on this one.

I totally loved that u labled the pie H1N1 Pie. awesome.

Amy said...

So now I am waiting for the recipe to magically appear, and if it does, /i am so going to always call it H1N1 pie.

Anonymous said...

too funny! I tried the graham cracker crusts for my pie this year and they didn't turn out! :-( the pie was ok, but the crust was not....

btw, I couldn't comment yesterday for some reason. I agree about the Christmas songs! (I think that was yesterday, right? my days are messed up) I think Santa Baby is kinda creepy....

valentine said...

hilarious! love the cartman "kitteh" reference. i promise to stay away from your pie if we ever have thanksgiving together!

Macey said...

That cat looks PISSED. That's all I can think about.

Tracie said...

I never though about using a graham cracker crust. That sounds yummy.