Tuesday, July 14, 2009

newlyweds: part deux

dear jessica,


OMG! i just heard that tony romo dumped you. the day before your birthday. are you okay? he's a jerk. you are so much better without him. he was holding you back. you want my brothers to go beat him up?

k, now that i got all of the "good girlfriend" responses out of the way. let's move onto the topic at hand, you getting back with nick.


yes, i think you should totally get back with nick! it's fated. i mean, he just broke up with that vanessa girl, you just broke up with tony....i see one of cupid's arrows at work here.



before you write me off for spewing utter nonsense, hear me out. sure, you guys had some issues the first time around. sure nick thought you were childish, and you thought he was a jerk. sure your creepy dad was around way too much. but that is all in the past.

you have both grown and matured and have no doubt come to the conclusion that the dating world is full of losers. so what are two semi normal, c list celebrities, who want a family to do? why get remarried of course!



look it, i even know what you can call your show this time around

huh? whatcha think?



wait, what about this one?

yeah, i think they rock too. call the artistic director, or you know, whoever is in charge of this stuff and tell them not to worry, valentine's got it covered.


oh, wait. got a little carried away with my own grandeur. sorry about that, right! you and nick. so i think you guys should give it another shot. but this time around, as your best girlfriend, i'd recommend not doing another show. in fact, just stay away from the public for a little while. and you should definitely lock the door and do not give your father a key!




rockin' it cupid style,



p.s. if you have a little girl, valentine is a great name. just sayin'

19 comments:

Kathie @ my net finds said...

and if they did, they'd get tons of media coverage and have so-so careers again!

Mighty M said...

Great suggestion!! I loved them best when they were together!!

Scrappy Girl said...

I totally thought the same thing when I heard that her and Romo broke up! I {heart} Nick and Jessica together...maybe if they got back together he could make a happy CD...his last one was a real downer!

Amy said...

I think newlyweds should stay out of the limelight, and live far away from their parents. Just my opinion though.

Alicia said...

haha!! what if they really did?? that would be crazy! maybe ashley can hook her up with one of pete's creepy band members...hmmm

Awesome Sara said...

if nick and jessica get back together again then the world will be ok

Kristina P. said...

I think that Jessica should get with one of the Jonas brothers. Even the engaged one. Who cares?

beth said...

i agree with awesome sara. it's like the world has been off kilter since they broke up (look at speidi's rise to fame. how else could that be explained?) everythign woul be right again in the world if they nick and jessica reunite. i would even start watching reality tv for those two.

Amy said...

Yep - I agree - they belong together - no one else can deal with them...

Ronnica said...

If they got back together, I hope they would learn from their mistakes and NOT live their lives before the camera!

AB HOME Interiors said...

They should TOTALLY get back together!! I love it, lets start a campaign!! LOL we will all go on strike hehe until they get back together!

Kristin said...

Maybe you should be an advisor to the stars?

Ashley said...

Ahh, I was totally thinking that they should get back together now. Like you said, fate!

D2the4thPower said...

I hear Jon and Kate are available. Just a suggestion.

Thanks for stopping by my blog!!

Orange Juice said...

ROTFLMAO
They wouldn't be "newlyweds" the second time around so maybe it would work!

foxy said...

OMG - your blog is cracking me up. Instant Follower here!! Too funny... and thanks for stopping by on mine, of course! ;>

And, man, I'm just sayin... I totally think they should try their luck again too! Do two wrongs make a right?

Chrissy said...

I hated Nick with Vanessa, she sucks. How sad is it that I was so bummed when Nick and Jessica split. lol. I think they should get back together too!

Whitney said...

Oh my gosh! They totally should. And this time around, instead of that ridiculous wedding dress, she should wear daisy dukes and he could wear a wife beater and cut-offs as well!

And Joe Simpson could be locked in a padded cell, lest he make anymore comments about J's boobs again. . . sicko.

Lizzie said...

i totally just had this conversation with my mom about an hour ago!

me: "hey mom, how are we going to get nick and jessica back together?"

my mom: "who the heck are they? and why do i care?"