Monday, August 3, 2009

wanna get to know me?

dear whoever cares,

so it has been about 4 months since i started this little blog thing. and i have come to realize that since demosthenes and i have chosen to go with a whole anonymous thing, you really don't know much about us.

it's probably just as well, because if you did get to know us, you'd learn that we are the biggest dorks and are totally lame. then before we knew it you'd start screening our phone calls, it'd hurt our feelings and we'd have some bout of depression. then we would no doubt end up at the top of some tall building, shaking our fists to the sky and cursing the gods for making us so uncool.

with that being said, i decided to reveal a little about myself, so please, don't make the above scenario come true, k? cuz i really, really hate heights, so just smile and nod along, got it?

so i enjoy music. i like most types of music. pretty much anything but rap and new country. but when it comes down to it, if i had to peg myself into one genre, it would have to be alternative. its the music that i grew up with, it fits me. i LOVE MUSE, keane, the kooks, jimmy eat world, garbage, the cranberries, REM, AFI and 30 seconds to mars

but i also have my guilty pleasure music. you know, the music that you secretly love. that you belt out while driving alone. the music that if someone asked you if you liked it, you'd totally lie, because it is the lamest music ever, and it totally hurts your street cred.

i am a closet fan of ace of base
(were they ever cool?)

i secretly love celine dion

(even though i make fun of her fans)

i discreetly let enya heal my soul

(while complainly about moon stone hippies)

and i covertly listen to phil collins

( loudly asking who listens to this shiz?)

i am also very uncool. i mean really.

i have a ridiculously old cell phone. that i barely use. i don't have caller id and i don't have call waiting. it's like its 1990 at my house.

i drive an incredibly crappy car. the air conditioner doesn't really work, the muffler is kinda falling off and it smells like feet. and i totally love it.

also, i don't tweet. not at all. i know all the cool kids are doing it, but i can't bring myself to jump on that band wagon. besides, my tweets would probably go something like this:

"demos and i decided that the volturi would prefer to wear togas.
think aro would like the breeze around his privies"

who wants to read nonsense like that all day?

and finally, i have strange pet peeves.

it really grosses me out when people say "get the creative juices flowing". it sounds very dirty to me. it's like, you're doing what? can't you wait until you get home to do that? very gross.

i also take issue when people say they want to have "babies". i am not opposed to people having multiple children, but when they say babies, i immediately envision someone giving birth, under the stairs, in a box. it's not pretty. so don't say it, and i won't have to think it.

i hate. hate. when people say "make love" whenever i hear that it makes me think of those lame, cheesy romance novels. its called sex okay? if you can't say it, you shouldn't be doing it!

i think that is enough for now. can't show you all my crazy at once. have to keep it limited to small doses.

hopefully you won't screen my calls now,


It's All Good said...

Yeah, you're definitely going in my phone as "Weirdo", it's official. =)

The Kooks are awesome, and I listen to oldies, who cares! I don't! =)

Jeanette said...

Hi from a SITS girl! You are a riot. Well done!

Anonymous said...

nah, you're 'aight. no need to jump off a building, hah. dorks are the cooliest :)

Sarah said...

First off, Phil Collins ROCKS! Secondly, Jared leto is hot and he's the lead singer for 30 seconds right? You are cool in my book. :)

Kaibee said...

Hey nice blog! Stopping by from SITS to say hi!

Anonymous said...

we have so much in common, I knew you were way cool! ;-) I love the cranberries but I admit to loving Enya :-) and I despise the term "make love" really gets under my skin when anyone uses it and I laugh like a juvenile when I hear it being used. you rule!

Scrappy Girl said...

I love all your kookiness...we have some things in common but in order to protect the bloggy illusion of coolness I won't tell you which one...however, since you told so many secrets I will tell you one...

I own Paris Hilton's music CD!

I saw the opened up my eyes...I saw the sign...

Ronnica said...

Thanks for stepping into the light a little bit more. I'll just pretend I didn't read that about Celine Dion, and you're cool in my book.

Your pet peeves made me laugh. "Creative juices"...yeah, that does sound pretty gross. I guess most juicy things do!

Emily (Good Frau) said...

I want to have babies.

Waxy said...

Love it - although I am a little frightened of the Phil Collins thing - although maybe he DOES get my creative juices flowing a bit...haha..that was gross.

Kristina P. said...

So funny!

And I HATE when peoplpe say they make love, as well. It's so skeevy.

Kimi said...

Ace of Base was cool back in the day. You know, when they saw the sign and it opened their eyes, back then. I totally have Everclear in my hunk of shit car right now and... hiding in the back of my CD case Justin Timberlake. Don't judge me.

Mighty M said...

Oh, The Cranberries... love them! Still do if they pop up on my iPod. I also hate the term "make love". MAKES me crazy!!! ;-)

Kristin said...

I once dumped a dude for uttering those awful, should never be used, words. Icksville. And I'm sorry dearest. You are most certainly not a dork.

Anonymous said...

babies babies babies babies babies ;)

Amy said...

I am happy to know I am not the only uncool person out there who refuses to "tweet." Who came up with the name "twitter?" I don't like being referred to as a bird.

Anonymous said...

I have a fancy cellphone which is why my home phone doesn't have caller id or call waiting. Only 2 people call it so it's either them or telemarketers. Most of the time, I don't answer it. Then I call those 2 people and say, "Did you call?" I loved Ace of Base. I don't think they were ever good, but the songs are certainly catchy.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and I love 30 Seconds to Mars.

Vivienne said...

Yes. all of those things. (Except Ace of Base and Celine Dion.)

If you like Enya, please do visit her sister's band: Clannad.
Their song "Harry's Game" - Awesome.
Duet with Bono, "In a Lifetime" - Awesome.

Anonymous said...

You are hysterical! I heart dorks!

I left you a little somethin' somethin' on my blog.

Lizzie said...

first of all. welcome to the openly dorky world of bloggy confessions :) Hi, my name is Lizzie and i am a geeky mama of 2, i love phil collins (old school phil mostly).

just so you know, most of us blogging ladies (OK, i have no idea about everyone else, i just like to think i am not alone...) are COMPLETE NERDS! hello, have you seen the crazy codes we have to figure out for some of our sidebar html???? only a true geeky goddess could pull it off well.

also, twitter. ladies you gotta bring it. i mean, really. I thought it was crazy lame. i did the myspace thing (who has time to decorate a freakin social site and commnet to everyone??) SUCKED! did the facebook thing (Um, why should i care if someone sends me a green patch kid or whatever, AAHHHH!) SUCKED! Now twitter...I can say what i want, when i want. i can answer others or ignore them completely and no one cares! yippy!! i can say things like "stepped in dog crap today, yeah!" or "hubby just dry humped my left arm. what should i do?" and i tell ya you will always get the responses you need. YOU. MUST. TWITTER!!

dude, this is a long comment. sorry *hangs head in shame* get a few Mike's hard lemonades in me and i just go on and on and on and on and on!!!